Why oh why haven’t we been together for all the many travel seasons that came before this one? This season is a gold mine of awesomeness. Here are some of the highlights from this week.
First up, a student who is interested in creating an entirely new career field.
You know something? We want to major in DenTITS as well. Do you know how much denTITS make a year? It comes in one dollar bills, but it’s a lot.
But on a serious note, denTITS could be like the new Hooters meets SportsClips. Imagine it. You’re getting your teeth cleaned with a giant helping of boobs hovering over you… this kid could be on to something. Getting your teeth cleaned suddenly became a lot more bearable and exciting. Well, for some. This kid went from weirdo to ADMIT! We certainly want to be able to say the inventor of denTITS graduated from our institution, don’t you?
We can’t explain the Scology major. It’s like Ecology but the plural version.
Second up, CSI is a thing of the past. New trend for most popular major of 2012 - 2013?
Because you can only major once. And in one thing. So it might as well be in swag. Swag pays well too. Just as much as denTITS.
Last up, one of the most offensive things we’ve ever seen ever. EVER. EVVEERR.
Let us be clear you ASSHOLES that planned us this fair:
We find this incredibly and utterly offensive for three main reasons:
(1) If you understand anything about travel season and admission counselors, we put any shit that goes in our mouth onto a credit card paid by our university. If we can’t charge it, we ain’t eating it. So, your little cash water stand to try to turn a profit on a Walmart bought pack of water isn’t getting any action from the likes of us.
(2) So, assuming you don’t have Intuit on your iPhone to accept credit cards, you would expect us to pay $1 out of our own pocket for your rogue water. Do you know how much money an admission counselor makes? Like none. City garbage men make more than us. How dare you attempt to swindle us out of the little money we have?
(3) And after all the moral dilemma we would face watching you charge us for water you should be providing for free, we’d probably end up purchasing your water. Because, in the end, we will end up with a parched throat in your hot-as-balls gymnasium talking to your kids about being denTITS and majoring in Swag. Well played, assholes.
Back here tomorrow for wrap up posts of the week.